Just because it’s in the store and you see it in every fashion magazine you own does not mean you need to buy it. Ladies, some things simply don’t flatter your body. Some things flatter you, but not me. Some things just don’t flatter anyone. Here is a list of the “hottest” fads you should avoid at all costs unless you want to walk around looking ridiculous. In that case, feel free to ignore this stellar advice.
Why these things are even in stores is beyond me. They’ve been around for ages and they always seem to sell. Do not ever purchase or wear a fanny pack. Buy a handbag. Buy a backpack. Shove so much stuff in your pockets that you cannot sit down, but do not ever buy a fanny pack.
Hollywood celebs seem to be wearing these around a lot lately. However, unless your name is Aladdin or MC Hammer circa 1990, just don’t.
While the theory is cute, many women do not realize that donning a cutout dress makes them look a lot like a prostitute. Remember that little movie from a couple decades ago? Maybe you don’t remember, but that’s okay. There were a couple of people in it. One of them is named Julia Roberts and the other is Richard Gere. See, Julia Roberts (maybe you’ve heard of her?) plays a prostitute who wickedly rich Richard Gere picks up in his red Ferrari and gives a week-long job to. She walks into a Beverly Hills hotel wearing a cutout dress. And everyone gives her the evil eye and the wrinkled nose. Yes, you look like that. Except so not as awesome because you are not Julia Roberts and Richard Gere has no idea who you are.
Do I even need to keep going?