Tiffany Raiford
Selfishness is not a bad thing; in fact, it’s a very good thing. Being a bit selfish from time to time allows you to stay grounded, happy and free of stress. As someone who understands selfishness, I can attest to the fact that sometimes saying no to the kids and yes to myself is a much needed reprieve. Sometimes saying no to something I simply do not want to do is a weight off my shoulders. When I’m not happy, I’m not functioning the way that I should. I’m not the mom I know I can be, the wife I want to be or the friend I want to be. When I’m not happy, I’m not the professional I want to be or the person I want to be; I need to treat myself from time to time to keep me happy.
When I’m happy and relaxed, I’m a better person in every aspect of life. Of course, I also have four kids involved in sports, activities, clubs and we have a busy social life, so there is not a lot of me time. I don’t have the luxury of booking a day at the spa when I’m feeling like I need some me time, because I am literally booked every single day for months at a time. What I need are things I can treat myself to at home when the babies are napping and the big kids are at school – it’s just an added bonus that they’re free of charge. If you are looking for some ‘me’ time and some selfishness to make you happy, allow me to suggest a few of my favorite things to do that cost nothing, but provide you with everything.
Read a new book
My favorite past time is reading. Sometimes when I’m feeling overwhelmed, jittery and upset I will take a book and head out onto my lanai and sit down for an hour or so with my book. It is an added bonus if it’s a rainy day and I can take a blanket out and cuddle in that while the rain falls outside on the deck. It’s amazing what that can do for my spirits.
Get out into the sun
I love the read, and I love the sun. If it’s not raining, I’ll treat myself to an hour on the deck in my lounge chair with a cool cocktail and a book. It helps that I get a little sun, and that the warmth on my skin makes me feel like a brand new person every single time.
Garden
I have the world’s brownest thumb, but I love to spend time in the garden. I love to get outside with my kids and plant flowers, try to keep them alive and really enjoy this time together. Did I mention it’s also amazing exercise?
Take a walk
It might not sound like much of a treat for yourself, but it really is. I love to put the babies in their stroller and wander around our neighborhood. The houses here are so amazingly beautiful and it gives me time to stop and stare at them, meet the neighbors and really take in the beauty of the perfectly landscaped lawns, the trees, the flowers, the golf course; it’s more relaxing than you might imagine.
Write
I write for a living, so it doesn’t really count for me. But sometimes I feel like I’m treating myself when I get to sit down and write what I want to write rather than what someone else wants me to write. It’s a great feeling to put my own thoughts, words and ideas to paper that I feel it’s a massive treat.
Photo by Getty Images
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